


we can live like jack and sally if we want

by Hieiandshino



Series: United States of Multifandom: English Edition [10]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Nightmare Before Christmas Fusion, Attempt at Humor, Halloween, M/M, Mild Gore, Mild Language, Mild Sexual Content, Nightmare Before Christimas AU, Poor Life Choices, i should be studying, it's not really a kink, new kink don't judge me, sanji in a dress, seriously
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-10
Updated: 2017-10-10
Packaged: 2019-01-15 16:09:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12324378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hieiandshino/pseuds/Hieiandshino
Summary: Halloween is near and Sanji has an admirer.(United States of Multifandom. Prompt 30:A commemorative day. Unrevised work)





	we can live like jack and sally if we want

**Author's Note:**

> _One Piece_ or _Nightmare before Christmas_ do not belong to me.
> 
> Title comes from the song "I miss you", by Blink 182.
> 
> This is an unrevised work, so I'm sorry for my mistakes.
> 
> Note: By the end of the fanfic there is a slang for trans people. It's not fully written and it has a context (the guy who says it is an asshole), but I still want to make sure people know this. Also, Sanji has some issues with trans people, something that is canon (unfortunately) and that shows a little on one part. Aside from that, I think it's pretty safe? Anyway, just wanted to let you guys know!

There is a dead _something_ in the middle of his kitchen. Sanji stares at it for a long time, listening to Carne snickering in the background.

“What the fuck.” Is all Sanji says. “Why?”

“Halloween is coming.” Carne remembers.

Oh. _Oh._ Sanji looks around, but nobody in his kitchen looks horribly interested in him. His eyes fall on Zeff, entering the kitchen. He immediately sees the thing someone left behind.

“What the fuck.” Zeff says.

“Sanji has an admirer!” Carne screams delighted.

For someone who is not a fire-like creature, Sanji really knows how to raise hell.

.

A long time ago his family was from the North.

The North Pole.

Not exactly Santa’s helpers, though they did a lot of business around Christmas. Sanji’s mother was a heavenly creature, a snow angel that died too early, an ugly death that forced many tears out of unusual happy creatures. Sanji was one of them.

How he left his kingdom and traveled to Halloween Town is his business only, but he is grateful nonetheless for their kindness, even if it happens to be gross sometimes, like the worms some kids give him for dinner, not understanding they aren’t edible.

Can’t be helped. Sanji still takes the worms and shares baked cookies with the children without batting an eyelash.

.

The siren that holds his heart, Nami, laughs when Sanji shows his newest present: something that seems edible, but only barely. “Looks delicious anyway.” It’s what she says. “Or it will be, once you’re done with it.”

Sanji stares at the thing with too many legs. “...Maybe.”

“At least, Cook-san,” Robin, a medusa-like creature, interrupts his musing. He doesn’t care, since it is she, who captured his heart, now only stone. The shitty demon, if he were here, would say she did alright and now is using it as a paperweight, the loathsome oaf. “It will be a challenge.”

Sanji smiles. He can’t disagree with that.

.

Halloween Town is extremely dark. There are blood spots on most walls and it doesn’t do any good to dwell in the shadows. People never talk too loud — unless you’re a D. — and their whispers hold deathly secrets.

Sanji loves it.

Even if people can easily know where he came from — pale skin and clean blond hair and new clothes —, they never look at him too much. It’s something Law, another fellow from the North Pole, seems to agree with.

Law is supposed to be a snowman of some sorts or a snow demon, but here he is a gravedigger that dates an unstable werewolf whose skin has more scars than furs. Surgeon of Death, it’s his nickname. Kind of cute. Sanji never hangs out with him much.

“Do you ever miss it?” Sanji asked once when they were on a bar and Luffy had to leave because even in a grim town like Halloween Town, he ought to stir too many problems.

“What?”

“The snow.” Sanji is drunk on bloody absinthe and he remembers the way the polar bears walked through snow storms, barely seen. The whiteness was something truly amazing.

Law drinks three more glasses of some type of poison. His skin is much darker than Sanji, covered in tattoos. A much better citizen of Halloween Town than Sanji. He never answers it.

.

Usopp is trying to get himself killed. Not in a good way; on the  _really dead_ way.

It all happened when he met a princess from the Easter Kingdom. She gave him a chocolate. He gave her lies in the form of stories.

“There is a reason why there is little to no communication between the kingdoms.” Sanji remembers his friend, who is a zombie.

“I’m not going to give up! I didn’t give up when I met you on those cold mountains of North Pole and saved your sorry ass from those Yetis! The brave and fearsome Zombusopp, King of the Dead, never gives up!”

Sanji rolls his eyes. Usopp never set his feet on the North Pole. He only knows what a mountain is because of Sanji. And Yetis are the best hosts that exist. Period.

“Someone is going to shoot you in the head with something that actually _works_ against you.”

Usopp trembles. “I-I-I’m not afraid!”

Sanji ignores him to contemplate his new gift from whoever is sending dead meat: it’s a giant bat. Sanji is pretty sure they are endangered.

Soup?

.

Halloween is approaching and everyone wants to celebrate on the All Blue. It’s a good name, though few people know what  _blue_ is. In Halloween Town bright colors are rare if they do not come from bodily fluids, and blue is so dark it’s practically black. Sanji is often stopped on the street because of his blue eyes and blond hair with little kids. He used to like the attention, even more from the deadly ladies from town, until some of them tried to take his eyes out or decapitate him.

Zeff got him sunglasses from Summer Island ( _paradise_ ) and a hooded coat Brook, the grim reaper, traded with him for some cake.

There is a note with the disgusting — but full of meat — centipede he is given by his admirer. Something unintelligible _Halloween night_ a blood digit covering some words _date_. Sanji curses himself because there is no way this horrible handwriting belongs to a sweet mellorine.

It’s a guy.

Still, Sanji kind of wants to go and meet this man. The food he is bringing is rare and popular. Even Zeff is happier and that is saying a lot.

However, he cannot leave All Blue without supervision. Their cooks are all incompetent fuckers and Zeff is stressed enough as it is. With him gone, he might die and have himself served as an appetizer by his employees.

He comments this with Luffy, who is eating the rest of the bat. He just came back from an adventure in another Kingdom and so he is happy. By the size of his smile, Sanji knows that wherever he went is now utterly destroyed.

“Aw, that’s sad.” Luffy says. “It was very hard to get these things.”

Sanji nods as he cuts a three-eyed fish — it would make any elf have a heart attack, but it tastes like fresh tuna, no matter how many days pass — and then stops. “What?” He says, turning to his friend and eternal Captain.

Luffy is a small ghost that never scares anyone until he gets angry. Then, not even Jack would stand in his way. Here he looks like a centaur caught in headlights before he stares at the door.

“Luffy.” Sanji says. “Don’t you—”

Luffy is already bolting to the door, flying, not running. “LUFFY!” Sanji screams.

“I CAN’T TELL.” Luffy screams back, already dashing through the maze that is the city. “HE MADE ME PROMISE I WOULDN’T.”

“WHO?”

“GO BACK TO WORK, STUPID ELF.” Zeff screams as he enters the kitchen.

“FUCK YOU, CURSED PIRATE! I’M NOT AN ELF!”

.

Zoro is the worst demon he has ever seen. _Not a demon, shitty angel_ , Sanji can hear the man in his mind, _a_ youkai. Japanese demon. _Whatever_. For once, he is not terrifying at all with his green skin and small horns. He also sucks at deals — even though he isn’t the type of demon who does demons. Youkais are meant to terrorize, right? Sanji never knows — and always gets lost.

They met, in fact, when Zoro was looking for his house in the forest and entered the Baratie.

The Baratie is located near the cemetery, on the opposite side of the forest. Inside, Zoro managed to get at odds with a vampire who was just passing by. Sanji ended up in the hospital, needing a blood transfusion. Since he wasn’t from this Kingdom, he had to strike a deal with an ugly witch and her cannibal reindeer ( _who is a vegetarian_ ) and get a transfusion from the only type of snow angels he wished to avoid: _Okama snow angels_.

Sanji hates Zoro.

“What do you want.” He asks, voice bitter and angry. It gives the youkai some pause before he rolls his eyes.

“Are you still angry at that?”

“ _Yes._ ”

“Everything turned out _fine_.”

No, every full moon he has to dress like a bride and wait for some idiot to put a ring on the cursed tree of their cemetery so he can take the guy’s soul. In. Drag.

“What do you want.” It’s not even a question.

There are a few seconds of silence before Zoro says: “I heard you’ll be working on Halloween.”

“I always work on Halloween.”

“I _know_.” Zoro sounds almost angry, but when Sanji looks at him, the youkai is staring at the door, his face shadowed by the mist of the evening. “I just thought you wouldn’t—”

Sanji stops washing the rice. _Oh_. _Oh no_. “Who told you?! Who _told you about the guy, I swear I’ll kill this motherfuck—_ ”

“Robin.”

“Oh, she is the most beautiful creature in the world~ Of course, she would share my plight even with the worst demon of all Kingdoms.”

“Oi, I’m a _youkai_.”

“ _I don’t care_.”

.

It’s Halloween and there is a full moon.

Sanji stares at Halloween Town, full of light and cheers and feels oddly sad. It’s not even the fact he is all alone on the cemetery, sitting by the crooked tree waiting for humans that won’t come for his trap when he could be working at the Baratie with Zeff and the other assholes. It’s that he is alone on the only night of the year in which everyone he knows and loves gathers to celebrate themselves, their cursed and crooked selves.

It’s almost like Christmas, though he never will tell anyone this. In Halloween Town, they know that Christmas is every day on the North Pole, happy songs, delicious foods, and presents. Family and smiles, cold weather and hot beverages. For Sanji, however, it meant a cell and lonely hours, his mother’s memories and Reiju’s old presents — she would always put up a face that she gave her things to him because they were broken, but truth was that Reiju would always break them so she could give something to Sanji every day, knowing it would be taken from him (but it’s the thought that counts _, it's a North Pole’s saying on gifts from loved ones_ ).

He picks at his flower bouquet, playing something his mother learned from Valentine’s Kingdom — where her husband and she spent their Honeymoon. One petal meant the person you were thinking loved you, the other meant they didn’t. Pretty sad, considering everything.

Sanji thinks of his admirer and wonders if he will wait another year for him. Probably not, if the flowers meant something — they would always end on _he loves me not_.

“I know you’re supposed to be a corpse bride, snow cook, but I don’t think it means you have to kill everything you touch.” Someone says and Sanji almost jumps from the place where he is sitting.

Zoro, wearing a beautiful green yukata with blood spatters on the end of the _hakama_ and a dog like mascara on one side of his head is right in front of him.

There is silence between the two of them, broken only by the unusual cheers coming from Halloween Town. Jack seems to be singing. Sanji imagines Franky, a Frankenstein-like cyborg, and Brook are playing with him. “What are you doing here?”

Zoro frowns. “I asked you to come.”

Sanji stares at him a little more. “No, you _didn’t_.”

“Yes, I did.” Zoro answers and covers his face with his dog mask. “On the note.”

“Oh. I— I didn’t—” _know it was you_ , his mind supplies, but now it makes much more sense. His heart, one of the few in this kingdom that is still beating, threatens to explode on his chest. Shit, he needs a cigarette. Sanji fumbles with his flowers before remembering he left them behind. He can’t smoke on this job. _Shit_. “—I couldn’t read. It had blood all over.”

“Ah.” Zoro says.

“But I’m glad I came. Even though I’m supposed to be here anyway. You know, curse and all.”

Zoro still has the stupid mask on and Sanji loves him dearly. Only realized now, but. He loves him. _So much_. “It isn’t this bad, is it?”

Sanji smiles and feels himself blushing. The problem with being a snow angel was this. The whole blushing-when-you-smile-thing. When he lived on the North Pole, he always thought he would melt. “Not at all.”

Zoro falls on his knees right in front of Sanji. There is blood dripping from behind the mask, so dark as it stains the yukata.

“What happened?”

.

Dresses are great.

Dresses are amazing.

Sanji loves it, sitting on Zoro’s laps, the skirt of his white dress covering their lower parts and thus their genitals, even though it doesn’t cover what they are doing. He thrusts again, feels Zoro inside him, the way he is more a vampire than a youkai tonight, biting Sanji on his exposed neck, drawing blood and sucking it with his tongue. Sanji tries to hold his whines and moans, but it’s hard and he is hard and Zoro is so _hard_ and they haven’t even finished it but he wants to do this again and again and forever and—

Zoro hits a spot. Sanji bites his shoulder in response before forcing Zoro into a searing kiss, their blood mixing and this— this tastes like a promise, this tastes like—

Sanji feels a pull. Something closes on one of his fingers. He breaks the kiss to stare at a ring on his finger. The _ring finger_.

 _Okay, that’s way too fucking fast_ , he thinks and feels the pull again. He falls on his ass right in front of Zoro, his yukata open to reveal his strong legs and hard dick. He looks affronted. “Why?” He asks.

“Why  _what_?”

“Why did you pull away?”

“I—” another pull “—didn’t—” and another. He stares at his hand and sees it turning into wood. “Aw hell no.”

Zoro screams something about fucking humans. Sanji agrees. _Fucking humans_.

The last pull forces him to close his eyes. It’s almost like that time he went to fight a high-level demon and he threw him towards a wall using his mind. Instead of crashing against one, however, he falls to his knees on a well-kept grass, listening to people scream. The ring is still on his finger, the cheap plastic glistening on the full moon. Sanji huffs and stares at the shitty assholes who summoned him.

Most of them look like those preppy frat boys dressed as ridiculous, often racist, costumes. One of them is pissing himself.

 _Motherfucker drunk people, just because it was getting good_ , Sanji thinks as he stands in front of the people who summoned him on Halloween while he was getting some. _Fuck my life_.

“Oh my god.” One of his victims moan. “It’s real. The corpse bride thingy is real and it’s a _t—y_.”

Sanji stares at them for a moment, his face blank, before he starts burning.

He takes each one of them to hell, doesn’t lose one of his victims. Ace, who is on duty that night, is very impressed with Sanji’s commitment.

**Author's Note:**

> I've been dying for an NBC!AU and suddenly I decided to write this instead of, you know, actually working on my thesis. Procrastination is a thing of beauty.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed! I know "North Pole" is supposed to be "Christmas Town" but the North Pole is much bigger and thus I could work with other creatures. I also expanded some of the Kingdoms around, because I could. If you guys have any question, ask away! Also, if you see any mistakes, please share so I can make this better!


End file.
